We have the sense that we are one, that there is unity within us. The part within that should be in charge of our autonomic functions; the animal, instinctual, survival mechanisms shouldn’t need consciousness in order to breath, digest, circulate blood or sense danger.
But when that part is responsible for our sense of unity, there is a problem. For while it is fully in control, responsible for and in command of our lives and consciousness – it is a debacle, a formula for an animal existence.
And then – As many of us found on the Intensive – that entity becomes passive toward the higher but retains active responsibility for the lower, and the change in us is enormous. The blinders are off. That part leaves our genuinely human parts be, it lets go, creates an absence and we are enabled to see, breath and bear witness. The singular response to this is being in a state of gratitude. Not attempting to have gratitude, just being in gratitude.
In the beginning of our work we swing between the automatic and sensitive energies; being asleep and waking up. Understanding the depth of our sleep is an essential first step, but to stay in the sleep-wake dyad is degeneration. Our work can become stale, crusty, and degrade into a kind of sleep-wake religion.
What many experienced on the Intensive was the sensitive conscious dyad; in JG Bennett’s terms the separation of sensitive and conscious energies. Mr. Gurdjieff’s ‘harnel-miatznel’, describes exactly what occurs when the conscious energy comes in and we begin to be in a more sensitive state – and things feel, (in Buddhist jargon) effortless. The blinders are now really off, there is a natural detachment in the higher regions of world 24 and we are related to community and to humankind.
The entity inside is not in charge, our reactional self is not in control and in its proper place. There is a quietude inside that enables a dispassion and open-mindedness. This is the natural world, not the super-natural, it is a first step, but an essential one.
Much of what people speak about in relation to the work is about the work. We see in this conscious world the difference between ‘about the work’ and living within the being-ness of the work.
The Three Presences become a reality; the feeling inside us of our first presence and of a different attention from the one we experience when we ‘wake up’. We can see that some things only exist in a world where this attention exists.
Secondly, we feel our connection to others and the notable experience of group consciousness. The second Racoo is experienced, not just as ritual, but as a feeling of presence.
Lastly, the blessing at times of a connection with the living presence of the Work itself.
The animal is—We need not reject our personality or animal nature. We do have an animal and an angel within and it is accepting both, living in both worlds together that is key. We tend to grasp at the one and want to destroy the other—but beyond the dyad of sleep-wake we can accept our animal; our lies, negativity, narcissism, pettiness and our self centered egoistic existence.
When the animal is not fully in control and another attention is present and we do remember our inner self, we begin to live and to see why this work is so important; life has meaning, three dimensions – we have Hope.
Things are slower, not forced – the automatic nature is more passive, empty.
What we found was the difference between having an experience and transformation. That is, being titillated by occurrence and the reality of genuine change.
The ‘having an experience’ is ‘about the work’ – finding out what something means, vs. living in meaning. Explaining concepts and having good intentions are not from emptiness. Nor is nostalgia and cult like meanderings. We need to look forward not back all the time.
Hope waters itself. For in this place there are questions – we accept that we don’t know. Questioning is an act, not just something of the mind.
Do I accept the moment or struggle with it?
Who is home now?
Who am I?
Regardless of our experience Wish must focus and be constantly renewed.
The touchstone of gratitude allows a letting go of our dominant center and our identification with our talent and strong suits.
The pattern of ‘being grateful for everyone’ will not stay, but is food for Hope.
There is an inner silence, a quiet inside. Again, there ceases a talking about the work but rather a living within the work.
We feel open-minded. There is a sense of independent thought and social conscience. Gradually we see that seeing itself is what will change us, not just going into states and experiences. This is the opposite of magical thinking where invention substitutes for experience.
The quiet within allows an entering from above and this is key. There is a deep relaxation, an unforced bottomless breath, an inner joy. I am no better than anyone and that is natural. This is the first rung, the beginning of the work of transformation.